Lost Without you
by CurlyBobs92
Summary: Lauren had been away from the square for 12 months alot has changed she is about to return will anything be the same again? this is my first ff please r&r and tell me if i should carry it on CB
1. Chapter 1

it had been 12 months since Lauren had left Albert Square after her short but sweet return , as she sat in her Deansgate office she knew she had to go home, she thought of nothing more than number 5 where her family was and she thought in great detail of number 23 where the love of her life lived probably with the blonde fake bitch who ruined her perfect life.

Lauren was suddenly was thrown from her thoughts into her reality by her assistant Lindsey who had become her best friend in the past year

'Lauren...earth calling Mrs Lauren Stone'

'God sorry Linds'

'I've Got Jay on the phone he said Gracie's nanny rang, she needs you go and pick her up your sort of an hour late to pick her up'

'Fuck! Linds can you ring her tell 'er I'll be about 20 minutes, I got lost in this bloody design' Lauren lied as she grabbed her key ' Can you also sent this to Jake and get him to send it to client and also see if he approves of the location of the London office?

'Sure thing boss, now go and get your daughter'

'You are a lifesaver' Lauren yelled as she was running out the door.

She didn't live far from her office a 5 minute walk to her Beetham tower which she shared with her husband and business partner Jake and her daughter Gracie they had started their design company as soon they arrived in manchester from their one bedroom apartment in the Hacienda and it took of, Lauren of course was the head of design and Jake the business manager they now was in a position where expansion was needed and according to Jake that was to move to Lauren's home city of London , where all of her past lay and a place she wished never to return especially never take Gracie too she wanted to put a distance between the most precious possession and the vile place,Lauren winced at the pending nightmare that in five days was going to become reality she shook the feeling off as she entered her apartment into the most beautiful baby she had ever seen

Three hours later Lauren had fed, played and bathed Gracie and had her in the bouncer whilst Lauren cooked dinner for her husband

'Baby the client L-O-V-E-S your design they're putting it to print as we speak and printed us a nice little bonus. Well done baby' Jake announced as he walked in and dodged boxes making his way towards his wife with the attention of kissing her ' you ready for saturday babe, the location is perfect for Stone LTD did you sort out where we'll be living?'

'Yeah we've got a few viewing of flats in Kings Cross but until we make a decision we can stay at mine its going to empty so Dad said we could stay there for a while that ok?'

'Perfect babe!' Jake beamed, Lauren knew Jake would love the idea of going back to the square he always said he loved the idea of being so close to the city but feeling so far away ' Hear that Gracie we're moving to where Mummy's from can Gracie say Mama?'

Gracie just gurgled and giggled and Jake , relishing in the prospect he had just told her where as Lauren on the other hand felt sick to her stomach at the thought.


	2. Chapter 2

Moving Day

M-Day came around far too soon for Lauren the movers had taken the boxes yesterday, it was becoming all too real. Jake had planned for them to leave a 7 that morning, Gracie on the other hand had other plans 4 am she woke her Mummy and Daddy up after an hour she was settled and Lauren decided to bite the bullet and set off, as they climbed into the car they eased onto the motorway headed back down south.

Lauren was going to miss Manchester it had become her home , she thought of the cafe she went in for the most amazing latte and bacon sandwich, she even loved the manc accent , she was jerked out of thoughts about her adopted home town by an incoming call

***Fats***

'Hey Fats!"

'Yo baby girl hows my favorite Mancuian''

'Fats I'm still a Londoner! but I'm good what about you'

'Baby girl I need a favor of a hot hot shot designer I know'

'What is it?'

'Design my leaflet for my gig at R&R for next week I'll pay if its mates rates?'

'Fats course I'll do it and its free thats if I get in free for your gigs'

'Course Girl can you get down for Monday?'

'I can do better than that I'll be there in about 3 hours I need go fats"

Joeys POV

I had to go through another day without her since she left for the second time, days felt like months,hours felt like days and seconds felt like hours, the last time I saw her she looked as beautiful as ever, wearing her off-the-shoulder black and white top,skinny jeans and her black wedges as always, I couldn't stop thinking about that day why was i so stupid,what the hell was I thinking

'Joey, my man ermm I'm having a meeting soon, you probably...'it was Fats he was cut short by the intercom ring

'Hello'

'Hi its Mrs Stone from Stone LTD to see Arthur'

'Yeah come in' I buzzed the door and wasn't expecting the woman who was walking down R&Rs stairs

Lauren's POV

I left Gracie with Jake still trying to convince her to say manchester city, I told him who I was meeting but assured him Joey wouldn't be there I knew he would I just didnt want a punch up on my first day back in London. I wore my leather leggings and red blazer I wore my six inch heels and accessorized with my wedding rings my beautiful emerald and pearl rose gold engagement ring and simple rose gold band

'Who is this stunner, she can't be my wife' Jake complemented me whilst undressing me with his eyes

'Believe it baby I'll be about a hour remember she needs a nap not watching the Premier league years' I replied and gave him a passionate kiss and headed out.

Walking across the square some how wrong I longed to be in Manchester in the Living Room with Linds having a catch up but no I needed to face my demons/the love of my life i reached the club and pressed the intercom

'Hello' it was him the moment I heard his voice butterflies fluttered in my stomach. Talk Lauren

'Hi its Mrs Stone from Stone LTD to see Arthur' I decided to use my married name I was hoping he would go in the office and I wouldnt need to see him as I made my way down R&R stairs trying not to relive my past and the last memory I had here, I saw him and I was frozen.


	3. Chapter 3

'Mrs Stone what you on about bruv? Who the hell is that' Fats questioned Joey which he just nodded in my direction his eyes fixated on me

'That would be me' the only words that I conjure up

'Mrs Stone baby gurl grew up! How longs wagon been hitched?' he questioned

'Two months' I answered watching Joey wince at my reply

'Well Mrs Stone,Manchester has changed you anything else or can we get to business?'

'No nothing new' I lied nobody in Walford except for Abi knew about Gracie 'I could do with a diet coke though please? I motioned to Joey and started asking Fats what he wanted for his design trying to avoid Joe's glare, after an hour and a half and a thousand awkward glances the meeting was over I kissed fats goodbye and arranged to double date with him and Poppy as I walked towards the steps he spoke

'Lo can we talk?' I glanced at him ignored him and carried on up the stairs all I could think about was Gracie

Joey's POV

If the meeting wasn't bad enough when I worked the courage to speak to her she blanked me my heart shattered into a thousand pieces all over again she looked beautiful just like my Lo before all the trouble I couldn't stand she was somebody else's wife I wanted nothing more than to make her mine and now the she was gone Manchester had changed her but it was for the better,I couldn't say the same for Jake I didn't trust him hell I wouldn't trust him with a rubber plant let alone the most beautiful and precious possession I had once owned. I was that wrapped up in my thoughts of her I didn't notice Fats leaving , once i was on my own I needed to block her out and there was two things I knew that could do that for a new hours alcohol and Lucy, I pulled out my phone and texted her

_Luce, fancy a drink and a bit of fun J xxxx _

I knew that she wouldn't be able to resist my offer so I grabbed a bottle of vodka from the delivery and headed home to find Lucy in my bed naked, I needed to get drunk before I could do anything I had been able to since I made the worst mistake of my life, as the night went on Lucy got more and more drunk and started to confess her love for me and how I was the one for her and then she made the confession that jolted the night to a close

'I'm so happy I slipped that vodka in Lauren's drink, I finally got what I wanted and deserve' she was slurring her words but I heard them perfectly clear

'What Lauren was right all along it was you. YOU ruined my life and sent her on that downward spiral, YOU could of caused her to die and now she's married and happy with someone else. GET THE FUCK OUT NOW AND DON'T BOTHER COMING BACK' I threw her out of my flat not caring where she landed, I slammed the door and broke down , I lost Lauren because I believed Lucy over her and I only had myself to blame

A/N I know this chapters shit I'm still thinking of a direction to take this feel free to give me ideas! CB xoxo


	4. Chapter 4

**Thanks to popscb for the idea! xox**

Lauren's POV

As I made my way across the square I tried to attract as little attention as possible as I made it to my front door my phone started bleeping , my heart started pounding as I thought it maybe him he'd already tried ringing me which I ignored I was relieved and disappointed when it wasn't

***Lindsey calling***

'Hey Linds when are you coming to London I need you'

'Well babes I'm in Landan now!'

'Seriously where are you?'

'Euston'

'Text me when your in Walford' I ended the call and made my way inside

'Lauren is that you'

'Yeah, you ok babe, hows Gracie, did you get her to say Manchester City?'

'No baby, she's asleep she's been a bit grisly maybe you should take her to the doctors?'

'Yeah I'll ring up tomorrow'

Lindsay's POV

As I dragged my suitcase down the stairs of Walford tube station I checked myself in my compact and spotted a hottie I just had to speak to this southern god

'excuse me can you help me' I tried to hide my moss side accent

'Yeah?' He replied

'I'm looking for a Lauren Stone, she was known as Branning round 'ere'

'What do you want with Lo?'

'I'm her friend/assistant helping her and Jay set-up in London'

'Number 5 straight across the square'

'Don't suppose your going to tell where your place is? I'm Lindsay bye the way!'

'Joey, and no I'm not seeya'

The cheek of him, looking round the square I couldn't see Lauren here she was such a city girl not an east end girl, even when I met her grabbing the same dress in the Top Shop sale that I had been eying up for months we had decided to go for a coffee, been best friends ever since , she even gave me a job when I lost mine and put me up when I lost my apartment, Jake was amazing too he looked after Gracie when we had girls night out/in, Lauren never drank which was good for me, she was an amazing friend I couldn't imagine why the people round here rejected her just because she had a drink problem it disgusted me . I had reached No 5 typical I rang the bell

'HEY!'

'Oh my God Linds am I glad to see you!'

'Let me in then'

'Want a brew'

A Few Days Later - Lauren's POV

Gracie had been poorly for a few days now so I decided to take her to the doctors the only thing was I needed to register her first, I made my way across the square with her trying to avoid anybody I knew which was proving quite successful I reached the surgery

'Hi I'm Lauren Stone I need to register my daughter here please'

'If you'd like to fill out this form and we can book you an appointment'

'Thanks' I grabbed the form and filled everything in freely

Name: Gracie Rose Branning

Age: 9 months Old

Mothers Name: Lauren Stone

Fathers Name, my hand froze I couldn't put who her real dad was news like that would be round the Vic before I even made it to Arthur's Bench.

Lindsay's POV

Lauren needed to take Gracie to the doctors and Jake was 'networking' with new clients so I offered to take her leaflets to Arthur/Fatboy yeah like he's going places I thought when I heard his name I made my way across the square missing Manchester so much I rang the buzzer of R&R and was let it

'Hi I'm Miss York from Stone LTD on behalf of Mrs Stone'

'Wheres Lauren, I'm Fatboy?'

'She had an emergency that came up'

'What you on about Darlin' Lauren wouldn't drop her mates for nothing'

'I think her daughter would class as something wouldn't you?' I raised my eyebrow

'Lauren has a baby?' Joey questioned as he walked in.


	5. Chapter 5

'Oh hello you again, yeah she has Gracie she's the cutest baby ever she's the spitting image of Lauren accept she's got these big beautiful blue eyes' I told Joey as he walked into the room

'How old is she?' he retorted (didn't even say hello how are your Lindsay, do you want a drink Lindsay how bloody rude!)

'She's 9 months next week, she was six months gone when she left here you couldn't tell though Gracie was underdeveloped due to Lauren's problems. I mean obviously she's not Jakes but he took her on, him and Lauren only got together 6 months ago and was engaged within the month, he was infatuated with her, I mean don't get me wrong Lauren loves him but I think theirs something or someone holding her back, she mentioned a guy round 'ere who I think it could be and Gracie's Dad, it was her relationship before rehab he truly broke her, I don't think she'd ever let Gracie anywhere near him, that child is the most important and precious person Lauren has in the world. Eh you wouldn't know who he could be?'

'Naaa love don't think he lives round here anymore' Fatboy answered abruptly whilst slyly glancing over at Joey 'Can I see my designs now? .

**Short Chapter I know just a little insight of Laurens Life after Walford, I'll try to post tomorrow ! CB xoxo **


	6. Chapter 6

Joey's POV

I couldn't believe what I was hearing Lauren had a baby, my baby I was a Dad, guilt ran through my body, if I was more understanding a caring maybe she would of told me, my brain trigged a memory

***Flashback***

'God Joey don't you get bored here on your own just putting vodka on shelves'

'Its my job aint it and I'm not alone am I Luce'

'Well I think its time for your break and I think you've deserve a reward' she said motioning towards the vodka bottle and removing her clothes

'Do you now?' I needed something to get my mind of Lauren she'd been distant, we hadn't got back together but it was just a matter of time or so I thought. I was lost in Lucy watching her take her clothes of I downed the Vodka and made my way over to her, our bodies met I closed my eyes imaging she was Lauren, wishing they was her soft lips I was kissing, I didn't even hear the door open I was just lost in my fantasy

'Joey I need to tell...What the hell I thought we was working on it, what you playing at? don't you ever look at me again Joseph Branning I hate you' her words shuck through me, I had fucked up again. The next day Lauren had gone, Abs told me that she'd gone to Manchester with Jake, tears filled my eyes I had lost her again.

***End of Flashback***

'Bye then Joey' Lindsay called to me

'What yeah bye erm Lindsay do you know where Lauren is? I questioned her

'Think she took Gracie to the doctors, then to Tesco, I need to go Jay needs help networking' she giggled to herself I knew exactly what she meant by that, how could they do that to my Lo.

'Joey leave it man it'll only cause more problems for Lauren and you know what could happen'

'I need to Fats she's had my baby'

'But Gracie isn't really yours is she yeah like DNA and stuff but its Jake who tucks her in at night, who she's going to call Daddy'

'I need to Fats and it'll be me she calls Daddy'

I darted out of the club making my way across the square walking up the stairs something felt different like I wasn't suppose to be here, I shook the feeling off and knocked on the door, there was no answer, I knew Lauren too well and lifted the plant pot up to find the spare key and made my way inside, there was pictures of the three of them everywhere Lindsay was right Gracie was the spitting image of Lauren so beautiful with my eyes and nose, I felt a feeling of unconditional love for the two of them, I couldn't just leave her, Gracie was mine and so was Lauren, I knew I would have to fight for them which wasn't going to be easy but it was necessary

'Joey you can't be here'


	7. Chapter 7

'Dada' Gracie had said her first ever word and it was to him

'No Gracie thats not Daddy, Daddy's out'

'I am though Lauren, I am her dad' Joey remarked

'No Joey, you aren't, yeah you might be her biological Dad , but you wasn't there at all the scans, when I went into premature labour with her , changing her nappy or doing 3am feeds, playing with her was you no it was Jake he's her dad, now I think its you left' I said ushering him to the door'

'No Lo, I wasn't there but you didn't let me, I'm her Dad and I intend to be so and nobody not even Jake can change that, what do you see in him, you do know he's fucking your 'best friend' as we speak'

'JUST GET OUT JOEY PLEASE' I broke down slammed the door and collapsed Gracie started to cry as she was startled by the noise, she looked at my with her deep blue eyes and said the only word i've been waiting to hear

'Mama'

'Yes, baby I'm your Mummy and I'm never going to let anybody hurt you' I sobbed to my baby girl, I never wanted Joey to know about her, it had to be Lindsay and her big mouth, Lindsay some friend she turned out to be , I knew Jake cheated on me but not with her, I feel so alone, I knew coming to London was a big mistake.

A Few Days Later - Joeys POV

I was sat at the bar at the Vic on my third beer it was Saturday afternoon, I'd got the day off work so I thought I might as well watch the West Ham game, hoping Lauren would be in she loved watching football, I never thought she liked the game but just the 22 men running up and down a pitch for 90 minutes and nobody could say she was a perv. The doors of the Vic swung open and it was him, the vile excuse for a man who my daughter was calling Daddy, it stabbed my through the heart it was bad enough he had my Lo but my Daughter it was more than I could handle

'Alright Alfie can you put the City game on please?' he questioned

'Na mate we only play West Ham games sorry' Alfie replied

'Ah come on Alfie, Gracie loves it and so does Lauren' I winced hearing him say both of their names

'Who's Gracie?' Alfie enquired

'My daughter mate' he said beaming

'She aint though is she' I found myself announcing

'Na mate, who's is she?' he coyly asked

'Mine!' I shouted at him ' She's my Daughter, and I'm going to do everything I can do, to get my two girls back'

'Joey I told you to stay away, why are you doing this, We don't need you we have everything we need, that includes Gracie' Lauren remarked before running out the door leaving Gracie with Jake

'Now Alfie can we watch the City game' Jake acted like he'd won ' Blue moon you saw me standing alone Gracie say it'

Gracie just laughed at him I ran out the door after Lauren

'Lauren why you doing this Babe I know you want the same as me'

'You seriously don't understand do you Joey its not as easy of just breaking up with Jake and becoming a family with you'

'Then make it easy Lo' I said then pushed my lips I against her which she returned ' I need you Lo'

'I think I need you too'


	8. Chapter 8

A few days after mine and joeys kiss I hadn't seen him or heard from him probably because I ran off crying my eyes out, telling him to stay away he didnt understand it would kill jake Gracie was the only daughter and child he would ever have (we found out he couldn't have them a few weeks after we got married) also if I left him I would be penniless and unemployed within a matter of seconds Jake put it in our partnership that I wouldn't get anything unless we was married for a year then after that I get 50%,which when I was signing it I thought me and jake was forever god I was such a screw up what made it worst was tonight was fats opening night as the resident dj at R&R which we had promised to go

'Babe you excited for tonight' Jake awoke me from my thoughts

'Not really,do we have to go?'

'Eh why not we have to it's good PR and that Sharon said she might wanna work with us'

'Well if you think it's for the best we'll go' I said trying to be positive.

I started getting dressed,having a shower which only muffled my crys I know now it's joey me and Gracie should be with not jake I tried telling myself no you've committed to jake,joey only leads you to drink

Jakes pov- I didn't know what I was playing at lately I was happy with Lauren her and Gracie is my life my girls I just get distracted far to easily I needed to do something to show her I mean it this time so while she was in the shower it came to me we'll get married in walford, our last wedding was amazing it was spur of the minute when we was in New York but nobody was there nobody who cared about Lauren so that's what I'll do I plan our wedding first stop was the vic to arrange the reception and help from Kirsty I didn't really want to ask Linds after what we had done to Lauren I needed to stop and make things better and this wedding would do it. As I made my into the vic he was there sat at the bar

'Havent you got a job'

'Havent you got a wife and my child to look after?' He rebuked

'Shut it mate she's mine accept it' I turned my back to him I wasn't here for a fight I was here to save my family 'alright Alf can I have a word mate?'

'Yeah what is it?'

'Im going to do a surprise wedding for Lo,I was wondering if we could have the reception here' I asked

'Course mate anything for Lauren,I'm guessing no champagne though?'

' well everyone else can have some just not me and Lo oh and Gracie' I made sure joey heard that bit

'Yeah sure mate come back with your date and we'll sort it out'

'Cheers mate' as I walked out the door that idiot was there

'I mightn't of been there on your first wedding to stop her but I will be on this jake' joey threatend

A/N hello sorry if its shit just something i typed at dinner on my phone, thanks again for the idea CB XOXOX


	9. Chapter 9

**a/n hey guys thanks for all the reviews sorry I've not been updating keep meaning to! CB xoxo this parts in Jakes POV **

I knew I had got to Joey truth be told he had kind of got to me to, he was threatening my family, my world I knew Lauren couldn't leave me for another year due to our business partnership, but I couldn't stand to see a storm in them beautiful brown eyes of her's, she never wanted to come here I shouldn't of forced her, yet again I'd hurt her maybe she would be better off without me, maybe I'm exactly what my ex wife says I am, No Jake your not Lauren's the one for you and the sooner you show her that its you and not the jumped up prick who broke her heart, the only good thing to come from their relationship was that he'd donated his sperm and they created Gracie, my baby girl the other half of my world, as soon as I saw her I vowed not to let anybody especially that vile creature hurt her not like he did Lo, she told me once when she had a relapse before she we got together that the night she took me up on my offer to move to Manchester with me that she was about to tell Joey that she wanted to give it another go and she was carrying Gracie, but before she had got the chance he was preoccupied with that Slut Lucy Beale it broke her, I listened to her so many nights in our Hacienda apartment cry herself to sleep all I could do was listen at the time we wasn't together it wasn't my place . Now it was my place I wanted to make him hurt, I knew where to start the wedding and tonight Fatboy's opening night, so I headed over to R&R.

A Few Hours Later

'Babe will you hurry up your going to look the most stunning woman there and Lindsay will be fine with Gracie, won't you Linds?'

'Yeah we've got a date with Prince Charming aint we Grace!'

'You will call if she does't settle won't you?' Lauren questioned Lindsay raising her eyebrow , she had been a little distant from her best friend lately, she looked stunning she wore a one shouldered red dress, black shoes and her wedding rings the rings I put on her finger not him

'You look stunning baby, I love you' I complimented her and told her the truth how could i be so blind and fuck every girl in sight when I had the most beautiful woman in the world as my wife and the mother of my child.

As we made our way across the square to the club I pulled my phone out texted Fatboy to start my proposal, we walked in the place was crowded as we made our way down the steps the spotlight was on us and Mumford and sons 'I will wait' our song started ,

'Can I have this beautiful?' I was practically blinded by the light but I could see Joey staring at us

'Like you had to ask,did you do this?'

'Yeah, come on dance with me' as we made our way to the dance floor hand in hand I pulled her close to me nuzzled my head in her neck as the song went on, as it was ending I pulled away from her and got down and one knee

'Lauren Stone, I love you so much, your my wife,the mother of my child, my best friend, my business partner and my rock. I know you didn't have the wedding you always wanted so I was wondering if you would let me give it to you know?' I gave my heartfelt speech to her

'Yes baby of course you can, I love you Jay'

I was so relieved as people applauded us I pulled out a Tiffany Bracelet I purchased that day with an engagement ring charm, a big apple charm, and mine and her initials charm. She was mine and Im never going to lose her especially to Joseph Branning, who I had noticed had run into the office as soon as she said yes. I had won, I pulled my wife into an embrace I never want out of it.


	10. Chapter 10

**A/N thank you so much for the reviews! this chapter is in lauren's POV**

What had I just done or said the room was getting smaller and smaller tons of people coming over to congratulate us I needed to see Joey and explain.

An hour later people had stopped congratulating us and me,Jake,and Whitney were all huddled in a booth, Jake on his phone 'arranging a surprise' Mackelmore came on which was one of mine and Whit's favorite song so we just had to dance to it plus some guys had been eyeing her up and she really needed to move on from Tyler.

'Whit dance with me?'

'Thought you'd never ask!"

'Oi Mrs Stone make sure everyone knows your mine!" Jake playfully yelled at me to which I smiled and pecked him on the cheek.

As we made our way to the dance floor Whit announced she needed to go to the toilet she was pretty drunk as she left I felt a tight grip on my wrist dragging me towards the office I looked up and it was Joey, I wasn't ready to explain yet and what if Jake saw us he'd put two and two together and come up with 5. As we reached the office he opened the door,practically threw me inside slammed the door and locked it

'What you think your playing at Lo eh? I thought you was going to tell him I thought we was back on track, I guess not eh? He spat at me I just looked down at the floor trying to find the words, Joey was the person I could say everything and anything to him, but all of a sudden I couldn't say anything 'Say something, Lauren are you enjoying breaking my heart eh? you getting of on it you and your little husband,was this your plan?.Rage took over and I finally found the words to say

'What like you and Lucy Beale did, like you and Derek did or the stellar performance you did on your own in the Vic? You know Joey the night I caught you and Lucy in here, I came to tell you I was pregnant with Gracie and that I wanted to try again I'd just come back from the doctors, feeling positive that this was a new start for us finally we could be happy but yet again you shattered that, and Jake was there for me he offered to take me to Manchester and look after me like a real man should, Like you should've' Tears was rolling down my face, I knew I needed to get this out 'Me and Jake we never got together straight away, we lived in a one bedroom apartment he slept on the couch and me in the bed, one night I was on the phone with Whit and she mentioned you and Lucy had been spending a lot of time together and it sent me over the edge I turned to vodka, Jake didn't judge me like you would've or people round hear he just looked after me, took me to the hospital and made sure Gracie was alright, thats when we found out I was having a girl, she was fine a little small but was a fighter, that night Jake asked if he could look after me and Gracie he was so sweet and sensitive so I agreed, we went from strength to strength, started the company and became engaged then we took a trip to New York and decided to get married that day, it was perfect I was happy.

'Lo your telling me your happy with another man, he can make you feel the same way I can eh? Because I'm not buying it'

'No I wasn't as happy with him as I was with him, but he made me feel safe and secure that he would provide for me and baby, that we'd be set for life and we are, so yeah Joey I would love to get back with you and for me you and Gracie to be a family, but I can't, if I leave Jake I loose everything and you've got to remember its not just me I've got to think of I need to put my Daughters needs first and thats means staying with Jake'

'If thats all your worried about babe I can provide for you' He said softly

'You don't understand Joey, your not a parent' I said without thinking of the consequences I saw tears filling his eyes

'Who's faults that Lauren eh?' He snapped at me 'My breaks over and you should get back to your husband don't you?'


	11. Chapter 11

A/N Lauren really put her foot in it didn't she! tanks for your reviews again! This is in Lauren's POV lets see what she thinks! CB xoxo

What had I just done it didn't feel like me saying those words to Joey, I had ruined any hope of us getting back together for good this time Lauren Branning the family screw up once again, I could only think of one thing and that was Vodka,not my daughter like a should be no just drink thats all I am the family screw up, the drunken one, a terrible wife like I was girlfriend to joey and a god awful mother, I didn't deserve the people I had in my life. Jake snapped me out of my thoughts

'Lauren,babe we kind of have an emergency,Alice is really drunk and when I say really drunk I mean like Britney Spears drunk, I think you should take her home.'

'Yeah, how did she get so bad? Don't tell me free champagne I'll take her home I'll probably stay there and look after her, we both know what can happen when we're a little too gone' I told him thinking this could be my chance to explain things to Joey 'Will you text me when you get home and just check in on Gracie?

'Yeah baby don't worry' He replied going in for a kiss to which I dodge and gave him my check instead ' Oh and I love you Mrs Stone

'Love you too babe' I reluctantly said holding up a very drunken Alice ' Come on miss lets get you home'.

As I walked across the square with Alice I started to wonder to myself how things would be different if I never caught Joey and Lucy together, Joey, Gracie and I would be a little family happy and in love, I picture my life now I'm successful, I don't need to worry if I can afford my next bill or a pack of nappies and I had a husband who worshiped the ground I walked of most of the time, but I knew he was what was best for Gracie and thats what I needed Joey to understand, as I reached number 23 my thoughts was thrown into disarray as I suddenly got the feeling if being home, I don't know whats right for me or for a matter in fact who was right for me. I pushed the door open helped Alice climb the stairs and tucked her up in bed, the whole house was mine for at least an hour, that means I have an hour to collect my thoughts, I don't know how but all of a sudden I was tired and needed sleep I figured 20 minutes sleep couldn't kill me, I found myself climbing out of my red dress into one of Joey's T-shirts and into his bed, I inhaled his smell and the feeling of home once welcomed me again I fell asleep in an instant.

I was woken up with a jolt I felt water hitting my face

'Get out of my bed, get out of my house and get out of my life Lauren' a familiar voice bellowed at me

'Joey I think we need to talk, I need to explain myself please just sit down and listen' I begged 'Please Joe?'

'Haven't you got your own bed and your own house you can infect and Lauren I've heard everything you have to say' He said bitterly 'Now I'm going to the bathroom by the time I'm out I don't want to see you here you understand?

I nodded to him tears started running down my face I quickly dressed myself and made my way downstairs and across the square, I had caused this I had no one else to blame but myself.

Classic Lauren Branning.


	12. Chapter 12

A few weeks after, Joey and my spat we hadn't spoken to each other there was a tension between us that had never been there before it felt like my stomach was being ripped out after every awkward glance across the square, i felt bitter towards him how after all we'd been through could he not hear me out just throw me out his bed just like that did I mean nothing to him? After that night I threw myself into three things Gracie,My business and my wedding I had naturally selected Alice,Abi, Lindsey, Whitney and Poppy as my bridesmaids and Gracie as my flower girl I had chosen pastel pinks and purples as my main color and today was the dress fittings, we had all decided to meet at Alice's house as it would be empty.

As I made my way across the square with Gracie in one arm and all the things that could remotely amuse her for the five minutes I was trying my dress on, I couldn't help think what if Joey walked in and he saw me in my dress and Gracie in hers would he even care

'Hello, you ready to see your dress Mrs Stone? Where's Lindsey?' Alice asked as she greeted me

'Hey Al, I can't wait and she had to go back to Manchester to see her Mum' I smiled at her

'Hey Gracie' Alice cooed at my daughter and gestured to take her off me

'Say Hey Auntie Alice, Gracie say Ally'

Gracie just laughed enough to say I only do what I want to do and when I want to say it I will.

'Come on then, lets try our dresses on' Alice practically dragged me into number 23.

The girls where all stood around admiring themselves in their dresses every single one of them looked drop dead gorgeous, it eventually was my turn to try my wedding dress on I had decided I needed to make up for my last wedding dress which was just a white midi that I'd found in New York the day we had decided to get married, I had gone for my complete princess dress it was just like Gwen Stefani's wedding dress meets Pinks wedding dress with a pastel pink bow, I hated to admit it but for the fist time in my entire life I felt beautiful then a pang hit me in the stomach the desire I had to wear this dress and become Mrs Branning not Mrs Stone all over again, I stood there just staring into mid-air picturing my wedding with Joey it would be perfect white roses and candles everywhere Gracie at our side just the three of us, my perfect little family, my dream, the dream I had thrown away, I was shaken out of my perfection by Alice shouting

'Joey you cant be here I told you I was having the house today'

I just stared at him butterflies dancing in my stomach, heart pounding, how could he still do this to me after all he did and after all he had said to me, I think its time to admit it to myself i was totally in love with Joey Branning, I was married to the wrong man, my daughter was calling the wrong person Daddy and nothing else staring at me for a few minutes he spoke

'You look beautiful Lauren'


	13. Chapter 13

'You look beautiful Lauren'  
'You ready to talk?' I said trying to ignore the butterflies in my stomach  
'I guess so' he replied looking quite disappointed  
'Give me 5 minutes take this off and egg abi to take Gracie'  
'Leave her here she looks settled' he pointed to our daughter who had worn herself out in all the excitement curled up fast asleep cuddling here teddy 'she sleeps just like you babe'  
'I don't think it would be a good idea Joe , I'll get abs to take her i need to wake her up anyway other wise she'll be a nightmare tonight'  
As I climbed out of my wedding dress I made a plan of what I was going to say to him

'Shes playing now with abs,look Joey I'm just going to come right out with it and say what I need to and if you don't like it that's your opinion' I said in quite a harsh tone what was I playing at I needed him to understand not dig my hole even more, he just nodded at me to continue 'What I said the other night that you couldn't provide for us I didn't mean it how I said it  
'So you how did you mean it Lauren because to me it sounded like you was being a stuck up bitch who was telling me I couldn't provide for my little girl, who you won't let me see and if you had you way I would never do known about ' I could see rage building in him ' You know what Lauren I thought you was different but your not you've ended up just like your mum going back to a man who cheats on you and treats you like shit' with that comment he mockingly started clapping which set my famous Branning temper off  
'You listen Joey when I said you couldn't provide for us I meant in the life we deserve and have, little fact for you I have a fucking good business that is now European wide, I have bought number 5,our flat in manchester and didn't really want to tell you this place you know why because if my little girl ever needs money and I'm not here I know she'll get by, she already has a education in britains best school paid and the ring on my finger £30000 paid for cash that's hers when she's older my daughters future is secure' I finally took a second to breathe and copied Joeys previous actions to me 'So congratulations Joey you have a daughter what have you got that me and Jake who by the way worships the ground she crawls on can't give her because she is the most loved little girl in the whole of walford with a stable future' I got up and walked towards the door 'oh and Joey your rents due'


End file.
